FOUR

FOURS (“The Romantic” “The Artist”) – “I can stand almost anything except a succession of ordinary days”
FOURS are motivated by the need to experience their feelings and to be understood, to search for the meaning of life, and to avoid being ordinary.
FOURS at their BEST are: warm, compassionate, introspective, expressive, creative, intuitive, supportive, refined.
FOURS at their WORST are: depressed, self-conscious, guilt-ridden, moralistic, withdrawn, stubborn, moody, self-absorbed.

HOW TO GET ALONG WITH ME:
Give me plenty of compliments. They mean a lot to me; Be a supportive friend or partner. Help me to learn to love and value myself; Respect me for my special gifts of intuition and vision; Though I don’t always want to be cheered up when I’m feeling melancholy, I sometimes like to have someone lighten me up a little; Don’t tell me I’m too sensitive or that I’m overreacting!

RELATIONSHIPS:
Fours at their BEST are empathic, supportive, gentle, playful, passionate, and witty. They are self-revealing and bond easily. Fours at their WORST are too self-absorbed, jealous; emotionally needy, moody, self-righteous, and overly critical. They become hurt and feel rejected easily.

WHAT I LIKE ABOUT BEING A FOUR;
• My ability to find meaning in life and to experience feelings at a deep level
• My ability to establish warm connections with people
• Admiring what is noble, truthful, and beautiful in life
• My creativity, intuition, and sense of humor
• Being unique and being seen as unique by others
• Having aesthetic sensibilities
• Being able to easily pick up the feelings of people around me

WHAT IS HARD ABOUT BEING A FOUR:
• Experiencing dark moods of emptiness and despair
• Feelings of self-hatred and shame; believing I don’t deserve to be loved
• Feeling guilty when I disappoint people
• Feeling hurt or attacked when someone misunderstands me
• Expecting too much from myself and life
• Fearing being abandoned
• Obsessing over resentments
• Longing for what I have

PRACTICAL SUGGESTIONS:
• Be proud of all your special gifts, talents, and accomplishments
• Work toward fulfilling the needs that were not met in your childhood. Treat yourself lovingly and compassionately
• Devote yourself to the task of self-discipline
• Find ways to make everyday duties and responsibilities creative or playful
• Commit yourself to creative work that will bring out the best in you.
• Be direct and specific about stating what you want and don’t want
• Be careful not to blow what others say out of proportion
• Develop a strong support system of friends, rather than relying on only one to meet all your emotional needs.