ONE

ENNEAGRAM:  SHORT EXPLANATIONS

ONES: (The Judge; Perfectionist)  “Thou Shalt Not “Should” on Thyself”
ONES at their BEST are: ethical, reliable, productive, wise, idealistic, fair, honest, orderly, self-disciplined.
ONES at their WORST are: judgmental, inflexible, dognatic, obsessive-compulsive, critical of others, overly-serious, controlling, anxious, jealous.


HOW TO GET ALONG WITH ME:
Take your share of the responsibility so I don’t end up with all the work; Acknowledge my achievements; I’m hard on myself, reassure me that I’m fine the way I am; Tell me that you value my advice; Be fair and considerate as I am; Apologize if you have been unthoughtful. It will help me to forgive. Gently encourage me to lighten up and to laugh a myself when I get uptight, but hear my worries first.

RELATIONSHIPS:

ONES at their best are loyal, dedicated, conscientious, and helpful. They are well-balanced and have a good sense of humor.
ONES at their worst are critical, argumentative, nit-picking, and uncompromising. The have high expectations of others.

WHAT I LIKE ABOUT BEING A ONE:
• Being self-disciplined and able to accomplish a great deal
• Working hard to make the world a better place
• Having high standards and ethics; not compromising myself
• Being reasonable, responsible, and dedicated in everything I do
• Being able to put facts together, coming to good understandings, and figuring out wise solutions
• Being the best I can be and bringing out the best in other people

WHAT’S HARD ABOUT BEING A ONE:
• Being disappointed with myself or others when my expectations are not met
• Feeling burdened by too much responsibility
• Thinking that what I do is never good enough
• Not being appreciated for what I do for people
• Being upset because others aren’t trying as hard as I am
• Obsessing about what I did or what I should do
• Being tense, anxious, and taking things too seriously

SELF-NURTURING TECHNIQUES FOR ONES:
• Spend some time each day doing recreational activities you enjoy
• Give yourself special treats regularly (flowers, bubble baths, etc)
• Accentuate the importance of humor in your life. Memorize jokes, collect cartoons, watch comedy shows
• Become aware of what you want and learn to ask for it (even for whims)
• Avoid the word “should”. Change the “should” sentence to “I WANT to..” or I
DON’T WANT to…”
• Take a a class in and practice stress reduction, meditation, yoga.
• Pat yourself on the back for allowing yourself to have one helter-skelter drawer, closet, or room.
• Take vacations to get away from work and compulsive doing.