NINE

NINES (“The Peacemaker”) – “I always procrastinate when I get around to it”
NINES are motivated by the need to keep the peace, to merge with others, and to avoid Conflict.  Since they, especially, take on qualities of the other eight types, NINES have many variations in their personalities, from gentle and mile-mannered to independent and forceful.
NINES at their BEST are pleasant, peaceful, generous, patient, receptive, diplomatic, open-minded, empathic. NINES at their WORST are spaced-out, forgetful, stubborn, obsessive, apathetic, passive-aggressive, judgmental, unassertive

HOW TO GET ALONG WITH ME:
If you want me to do something, how you ask is important. I especially don’t like expectations or pressure; I like to listen and to be of service, but don’t take advantage of this; Listen until I finish speaking, even though I meander a bit; Give me time to finish things and make decisions. It’s OK to nudge me gently and non-judgmentally; Ask me questions to help me get clear; tell me when you like how I look I’m not averse to flattery; Hug me, show physical affection. It opens me up to my feelings; I like a good discussion but not a confrontation; Let me know you like what I’ve done or said; Laugh with me and share in my enjoyment of life.

RELATIONSHIPS:
NINES at their BEST are kind, gentle, reassuring, supportive, loyal, and nonjudgmental. NINES at their WORST at stubborn, passive-aggressive, unassertive, overly accommodating, and defensive.

WHAT I LIKE ABOUT BEING A NINE;
• Being nonjudgmental and accepting
• Caring for and being concerned about others
• Being able to relax and have a good time
• Knowing that most people enjoy my company; I’m easy to be around
• My ability to see many different sides of an issue and to be a good mediator and facilitator
• My heightened awareness of sensations, aesthetics, and the here and now
• Being able to go with the flow and feel one with the universe.

WHAT IS HARD ABOUT BEING A NINE:
• Being judged and misunderstood for being placid and/or indecisive
• Being critical of myself for lacking initiative and discipline
• Being too sensitive to criticism; taking every raised eyebrow and twitch of the mouth personally
• Being confused about what I really want
• Caring too much about what others will think of me
• Not being listened to or taken seriously

PRACTICAL SUGGESTIONS FOR A NINE;
• Take the first step to change a situation that isn’t right, instead of hoping that things will change by themselves
• Ask others to join you in your interests rather than always going along with theirs
• Bring up your problems when talking with others rather than only listening to others
• Instead of answering, “I don’t know” or “Whatever you want is fine with me,” say, “I’ll let you know when I decide.”
• Tell people when you want to be alone.
• Express your opinions and your feelings. Learn to rock the boat a little
• Learn to become aware of, and then appropriately express, your anger